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The Empty Nest Syndrome: Having Your Life Back On Course
Time is a curious phenomenon. Time brings changes. From tucking your little ones in bed every evening to suddenly transforming their rooms into spare bedrooms, time is full of surprises. Even if you would rather they not grow up, you know that they will, and one day they have to find their own life paths. When this time arrives, it can be difficult to get used to their not being around anymore. Nevertheless, with the right attitude, you can overcome this major change in your life with relative ease.
Before sobbing or celebrating, whichever is your tendency when you first come home to an empty nest, remember that you will always be a parent. Your kids are not as dependent on you as they once were; however, they still want a connection with you. When children are small, they are dependent on you. You must teach them, train, them, guide them, and discipline them. After they have grown, this dependent relationship develops into something more. Most likely they will still require your advice, and you are always going to provide them with it. However, very soon you will notice a reversal in this trend as you begin to seek their advice on matters concerning you. The relationship can move away from the parent-child relationship of their childhood toward a friendship, a very close and beautiful friendship if neither of you seeks to be controlling.
Your child moving out of the house can present you with a new opportunity to get reacquainted with your spouse. You don't get much uninterrupted together time when there are children in the house all the time. Now you can get to know your spouse better on an intimate basis and work toward a better relationship. You have an opportunity to do all of the things that you wanted to do before, but couldn?t. Unleash your inhibitions and have fun with your spouse. When your children leave, your relationship with your spouse may get romantic again. You can enjoy similar benefits if you're a single parent. You can use your newfound free time as the perfect excuse for going out and meeting new people. In the process you could find yourself falling in love and starting a whole new life.
It?s hard to fulfill your adult fantasy of travelling around the world or launching a potentially risky home business when you have children to care for. With your kids away, however, there is nothing stopping you from embarking on your dream.
Time is always at a premium when you're raising children. When they have moved on to start families of their own, you will have all the time you want to do the things you have dreamed about doing while you wait for grandchildren to steal your heart a second time around. With more time on your hands, you can consider advancing your education, finally working on your novel or taking the time out to exercise more regularly.
It takes a while for people to become accustomed to the idea of their children leaving. However, try not to solve the problem by getting into things too quickly and ending up way over your head in potentially irreversible life changes. Don't do things you might regret just because you want to fill up an empty space in your heart. Only then can you proceed with your life and your new crazy notions.
You should, however, continue to keep in touch with your kids. Call them up off and on to ensure that you remain in touch with each other. Just as in the past, you will need to be there in their lives as they struggle through difficult phases, helping them discover their strength and fortitude in times of crisis. All that you can do now is be there for them, and hope that they make you and the rest of your family proud.
